Dear Keg Steakhouse.

It is not 1987.
This commercial is terrible.



Fire whoever you need to fire and get back to telling people how you guys make really really good steaks.

Tracy Morgan Can Take a Joke, but Can't Take Fags.

I didn't post this to spread a rumor.  We are critical thinking adults; this may be bullshit.  This could be a gay man's social science project, it could be a drunk interpretation, it could be an outright lie to gain some notoriety.  I don't know and I don't care.  My point in posting is just to illuminate my earlier point about using the word "fag"... sometimes only you can decide if hurting people is worth it.
If hurting people is worth using a certain word or expression.
If ruining someone's evening is worth making the joke.
If encouraging alienation and hatred in people is worth the applause.

This is a personal choice and we all make it in different ways evey day, celebrity or not.  But if someone left a conversation with me feeling like this, or feeling the need to walk out, I wouldn't be watching my language because they were the sensitive ones.

It would be because I was.


UPDATE: VIDEO

Jay Mohr does world's best Tracy Morgan impression.

Sometimes I Can Be Amazing.

"Since "reality" is so subjective based on your perception (see: "it's raining"- go back inside vs "it's raining"- get an umbrella), I think it is in our best interest to be optimistic. 

It doesn't always have to equate to being naive."

FHM Says Horribly Ignorant Things About Andrej Pejic- I Am Disgusted. UPDATE

Barnes & Noble and Borders stores south of the border are censoring the latest cover of Dossier Journal featuring androgynous male model Andrej Pejic. 

This is a screenshot because someone at FHM clued in to how offensive this was/is and removed the original post.

"'Thing’ is quite accurate.” 
"Pass the sick bucket.” 
"More troubling..."
"One trend we won't be following."

THIS IS IN PRINT?

Besides this just being downright juvenile, it’s incredibly inaccurate to compare the male-identified Pejic with the female-identified Lea T. While he plays around with androgyny, Pejic has never expressed any desire to actually become a woman, whereas Lea T felt she was born the wrong sex and took steps to remedy the situation. I’d say this is pure homophobia and transphobia, but Pejic has not publicly identified himself as either gay nor transgender. From what I can gather, they simply can’t handle the fact that he’s different and does not appear to be that which "they" believe a MAN should represent (cue football throwing, beer guzzling and steroid use.) A sadly familiar scenario that triggers many a schoolyard bully to ruin some poor kid’s life and now children are dying because of it.

Shouldn’t we know better than to propagate this shit?

I am just going to sit here and stare unbelievably at this for a moment.

UPDATE:

I received an email from Newsy who supplied me with a great video that also illustrates how others are reacting to this. So far, I have not seen any articles interviewing Andrej himself.

"I read your post “FHM Says Horribly Ignorant Things About Andrej Pejic – I Am Disgusted” where you provide your reaction to the slanderous comments made on FHM’s website.  You summed it up perfectly when you said that they simply can’t handle the fact that Andrej is different.  I appreciate that you compared these comments to schoolyard bullying, because that is essentially what they are.  Recently Newsy.com produced a video about the FHM’s comments and Andrej’s Dossier cover:

http://www.newsy.com/videos/australian-supermodel-with-a-twist/

It provides a lot of contextual information about Andrej and the controversy surrounding him and his androgynous style. I think the video compliments your post well, and I hope you will consider embedding it into your 'In the War Between' blog post.  Traditional news outlets often overlook LGBTQ issues.  It is important to present these stories to the public and shed light on ignorance.  Blogs like yours do an excellent job providing the public with the news they need."

pp

Multisource political news, world news, and entertainment news analysis by Newsy.com

What Men Really Need to Know.

1. Never ask a woman if she wants to have sex by asking her if she wants to have sex.

2. It is more important to have good health than good health insaurance.

3. Don't bluff more than once in a poker game with friends.

4. When one of the big bosses at work unexpectedly says something really cheery and friendly to you, he means absolutely nothing by it. Not even if he's your father.

5. Wear as much black as you can. It makes you look slimmer and cooler. But avoid black jeans.

6. When someone in your family is going through a divorce, always side with the blood relative.

7. Pointedly praising something unusual a person owns or has done will make you appear far smarter in his eyes than a 10-minute discourse on world events.

8. Yes, speak softly and carry a big stick. But don't mumble. And don't swing the stick.

9. The man who can't dance, can't converse, and can't provide psychological support to a woman is only half a man; the other half can't cook, can't clean, and badly wants a drink.

10. Do not get a visible tattoo larger than your penis.

11. Be aware that most people are operating on a very condensed version of the 10 Commandments: the part about murder.

12. There will be times when good neighbors are more important than a good neighborhood.

13. Telling a woman, "You're a great person," is taken as the lead-in to a confession that you don't love her.

14. Trying to "teach someone a lesson" never works.

15. Easy on the mayo.

16. Be careful about publicly discussing your hobbies, as most hobbies strike people as somewhat pathetic: most notably, collecting stamps, comics, coins or anything else, bird-watching, bowling, rockhounding, spelunking, table tennis, poetry, dog shows, chat rooms, polka music, yoga, herpetology, marathon running, and religion. The only hobbies you can safely own up to when among people you need to impress are fly-fishing and golf.

17. Never buy a woman a gift at a kiosk.

18. Never wear clothing that your coworkers avoid—the bow tie, the suspenders, the green suit. While you might think you're expressing your individuality, your colleagues will perceive it as a rejection of their group culture; you'll become a person who probably can't be trusted.

19. Do not bring lunch to work.

20. Rainbows are God's way of reminding us that beauty is an optical illusion, except in sports cars.

21. You will never become a rock star.

22. As you go through life, you will discover that more and more of the subjects you studied in college are useless, with the exception of abnormal psychology.

23. Never make any sort of generalization concerning gender, even if it's so true God himself would back you up.

24. Telling a person in management, "I'm a bit of a philosopher," means you're a total loser.

25. When running in the park on a hot day, do not take off your shirt if you are a really hairy sonofabitch.

26. Never hesitate to admit the error of your ways when under oath in federal court.

27. Always wear freshly laundered or pressed clothing to work. Even one wrinkle will have certain coworkers creating—and perhaps sharing—scenarios of debauchery or financial distress.

28. Do not say hi to a perfect stranger in any town with a population over 2,000. The friendly gesture in Beaver Dam Falls is a scary act of aggression in Toronto.

29. Always imply, in every possible way, that the person you're talking to is smarter, better-looking, slimmer, and more successful than they really are.

30. When choosing a bottle of wine to bring to a dinner party, spend between 15 and 20 dollars. That's for a bottle, not a gallon.

31. Do not come on to the new female pastor, unless she winks at you during the sermon.

32. When dating, an ounce of appearance is worth a pound of substance.

33. The way a woman looks, acts, and talks says nothing about how good she is in bed.

34. It is okay to admit in conversation that your accountant used his imagination to save you $500 in taxes, but never admit you saved 5 bucks by refilling the vodka bottle in the minibar with water.

35. Never get into a pissing match via e-mail. If he forwards, you lose.

36. Never suggest to another person at the gym that he's not working hard enough to accomplish anything.

37. People who live in glass houses are idiots.

38. Going insane while watching a hockey game is a sign of mental health.

39. When a man meets another man, bonding begins when they both say things they hope no one else hears.

40. The person who sincerely says to you, "I want to get to know you better," is a person you probably don't want to know at all.



From blog post: http://arbitral.livejournal.com/233787.html

The truth about marrying a younger man.

The older woman and younger man relationship is no longer a fad, it's a phenomenon.

MY younger man.

Canadian beauty Claudia Opdenkelder, CEO of wildly popular dating site CougarLife.com, was a 39-year-old confirmed bachelorette when she met the love of her life, a man 13 years her junior. A year later, they are engaged. "I have never been happier," she says.

We chatted with Claudia about the benefits of a relationship with a younger man.

Are younger men different to older men?
Yes they are. We have to thank their mothers — empowered women who have a voice in the family. Some were out there working or bringing up kids on their own. These guys have grown up seeing strong women.

What do you think the appeal of the older woman is for the younger man?
A lot of guys don't date younger girls anymore because the girls are wondering how much money the guys make or what kind of car they drive. We're not built that way — we've already established ourselves and we don't need to worry about them being able to support us. We can both just enjoy the ride and see where it goes.

What are the advantages for the ladies?
They have no baggage — you don't need to hear about their troubled pasts. They have zero ego — you're not dealing with someone who has a tough time with you making more money than them. They're so confident — they love that you're in your sexual prime and what you see is what you get. I think it just happens to work out because the chemistry is there and it's perfect timing. I've told my fiancé, Paul, "If I had met you any sooner, I wouldn't have been ready for you yet."

Some women reject younger men, assuming they won't want children soon enough.
The issue of children is something that needs to be discussed no matter what age — or religion or culture — you are. Something like that is very individual.

When I met my fiancé he was 26, and he was already ready for everything. I told him where I stood and he said, "If you don't want kids or marriage I am still going to be with you. It's not worth losing the love of my life over."

So we moved in together and as time went on we started to discuss marriage, and I thought, "Well, Paul is the best thing that's ever happened to me, what's marriage?" So now I'm all about it … I'm planning the wedding! The topic of kids came back up and I've told him I'll think about it.

What about the fear of being left when you start to age?
Well you know what? Men aren't looking so cute when they get older either — they're balding and they have man boobs and hair coming out of places it shouldn't! My fiancé and I joke about it all the time. I tell him, "You need to be worried that I'm not going to trade you in for someone younger."

As long as you're a strong, confident woman and you have a real chemistry and a real relationship, getting older is not something that's going to be the breaking point. It's never been about the younger woman, they know what they are getting into, so why would they trade you in?

With any relationship you don't know what you're going to get. You hope that in the end you're happy and not jilted, and I think you get that at any age.

So do you believe in true love?
Yes, I believe in true love, but I also believe that you need to go through a lot of fun, sexy relationships before you find the one. As you get into the "dirty thirties" you're finally comfortable with your body, and you're able to feel sexy and not feel like you have to make excuses. You embrace yourself.

Paul is one in a million. He's very mature and worldly and cultured and just all around excellent person. It had to take someone like him to get me to this place.


source: http://aww.ninemsn.com.au/family/relationships/8230650/the-truth-about-marrying-a-younger-man

GREAT ARTICLE BY MIKE ROSS REGARDING THE DEATH OF THE SOUND.

 A great, pull-no-punches article about the format change of 95.7: 

CUCKOO EDMONTON RADIO: Ah, Juicy Fruit 

By Mike Ross

 

The gut reaction to listening to the radio station formerly known as the Sound – which relaunched Monday as Lite 95.7 – is to re-enact a scene from One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest.

It’s the part where Jack Nicholson’s character McMurphy tries to strangle the evil Nurse Ratched after she goaded a teenage boy into committing suicide. So they give him a lobotomy. The Chief sees what they did to his best buddy, and is unable to bear the thought of Mac living without frontal lobes, personality or identity in a hellish mental hospital for the rest of his life. So the Chief smothers his friend to death with a pillow before smashing a giant sink through the window and running free into the night – probably to a beautiful fantasy world where the radio dial is full of stations just like CKUA and CBC and CJSR.

Yes, listening to Lite 95.7 is exactly like that.

The Sound has been wiped clean. The last few months must’ve been some wonderful, bizarre dream where Alanis Morissette lived in the same Old Apartment as Beck and Stevie Ray Vaughan in the ‘90s at 9. Now it’s time to wake up and get back to work because Lite 95.7 is our “At Work Station.” I hate Mondays.

There’s some bad news for all those Sound supporters who came out of the woodwork: Nothing is going to change. Thanks for all your letters, but where were all you people before? Give your flowers to the living, why don’t you? Too late.

“Well, I did,” pipes in local radiohead Sheena Millar. She was so pissed when her favourite radio station died that she wrote a letter to the station’s head office, Harvard Broadcasting. It expresses deep disappointment in losing “one of the most original radio stations this city had” and ends with a plea to “reconsider.” Never happen. The switch was a “business decision,” which always sounds lame until you realize how many people’s livelihoods depend on business decisions. The Sound wasn’t getting big money for ads (with a sad 0.8 rating), and something had to be done or a lot of people might’ve lost their jobs. That is, unless Harvard had been willing to invest a little more money and a little more time for cool radio in Edmonton. But they obviously weren’t. So when EZ Rock flipped to Virgin, there was a hole in the Edmonton light rock market – which is where the light rock market should be, frankly – and Harvard rushed to fill it. Done deal. Plus they still have this weird thing in their license that says they have to play a certain percentage of blues and/or jazz. Michael Buble is of course perfect: Fulfils genre, Lite Rock mandate and Canadian content in one maudlin burst of schwing.

We reached what we hoped would be a disgruntled former Sound announcer who was “let go” after the switch. The person didn’t sound angry: “I was shocked. I thought they would’ve given it more time. But I understand. It was a business decision. Shit happens.”

Millar knows Harvard won’t budge, but she hopes that maybe one of the other stations will get inspired by the outrage of her and other former Sound Supporters – whom she describes as people who WANT to listen to commercial radio but generally don’t because there’s usually nothing good on (same can be said for TV) – and “pick up the ball.” She agrees that a radio station can be more than a mere jukebox, that it can turn into a more personal relationship. When one gets into the zen of listening for long periods of time, while studying, say, or making out, a good radio station can to take on a parental, almost God-like role: They’re talking to YOU. They’re picking music they think YOU would like. They’re playing songs YOU lost your virginity to.

Millar joined a new Facebook group: Edmonton Needs a Decent Radio Station.  It’ll have to be one we already have. The Edmonton radio dial is full. No more new stations, for now.

I listened to about two hours of the new Lite 95.7 morning show the other day with the husband-and-wife tag team of Jamie and Dan, and it wasn’t COMPLETELY horrible. The hosts were charming and mildly witty in the manner of mid-morning talk shows. They played Tainted Love, talked about how Jamie doesn’t like moustaches and then made a bit of fun of Matthew McConaughey. She loves him. He doesn’t. Oh, the matrimonial hilarity we’re in for! They played The Climb by Miley Cyrus, after which Jamie noted that the song is inspirational to people going through “stuff.” They gave a plug for Lite 95.7’s “secret santas,” who had been roaming around town giving away money during the audio lobotomy process over the weekend (72 hours of Christmas music). Then they played Daughters by John Mayer. That song gets me misty every time. They played Taylor Swift and LeAnn Rimes and Michael Jackson, then some old-time swing ballad I’ve heard a million times before. They played Shania Twain. As the morning show drifted off, they played a non-stop block of 95.7 minutes of something. I’m just going to go ahead and call it “SHIT,” OK?

Pass the pillow.

(In addition to CKUA and CBC and CJSR, the Chief would probably listen to Edmonton’s aboriginal station CFWE 98.5 FM, too. Great station. Very interesting. We’ll get to them on another date.)


source: http://www.gigcity.ca/2011/03/30/cuckoo-edmonton-radio-ah-juicy-fruit/

My Letter to Harvard Radio Regarding the Termination of The Sound Radio.

March 26, 2011


Dear Harvard Broadcasting,

No doubt this is not the first nor last email you will be receiving about the recent termination of 95.7 The Sound in Edmonton Alberta, but please allow me a moment to express my deep disappointment in your obvious economically based decision to replace one of the most original radio stations this city has had with a Lite radio station that will have little impact on anyone or anything that resides outside of your bank accounts.

I have seen the ratings quotes.
I have read about the slow incline of listeners.
I have heard of the advertising shortfalls.

But I have also LISTENED to the station since it's inception.  And it was ELITE.

It may have been for a less homogeneous group of people than easy listening cubicle workers, but it was regarded in serious artistic circles as Edmonton's hope for music that spoke for people WHO ACTUALLY LOVE MUSIC.

It wasn't just a representation of the listeners. 
It was an outlet for local bands to showcase their talents. 
It was an outlet for local DJs with personality and spunk and originality to have their uniqueness appreciated. 
It was an outlet for people to hear about small-stage shows in town at neighbourhood pubs, to raise awareness of all the amazing attitude and ingenuity this amazing city has to offer ALL OF US. 

Your impatience and inability to take a risk is a massive disappointment.
The fantastic people of this exceptional city deserve more than the same "good enough" entertainment.
The brilliant people of this high class city are ready for people to stop spoon-feeding them "status quo" media.
THIS CITY IS CAPABLE OF ENJOYING MUSIC THAT REQUIRES MORE OF US THAN JUST TO LISTEN.

We wanted a radio station that got us involved in our city and bring the vibrancy out in the people, the places, the politics.
And we finally had that.

Until you gave up on it.
And gave up on us.

Please reconsider.
The people of Edmonton deserve it.


Thank you for your time,

Sheena Millar
fiercecalm@msn.com
(780)XXX-XXXX

Mike Ross writes an article regarding the sound, including a conversation with me about this letter and my thoughts on the station:   

http://inthewarbetween.blogspot.com/2011/03/great-article-by-mike-ross-regarding.html

To write your own letter...

Harvard Broadcasting
CENTURY PLAZA
1900 Rose Street
Regina, Saskatchewan
S4P 0A9
...
phone: (306) 546-6200
Fax: (306) 781-7338

tkonrad@harvardbroadcasting.com

(The website had an old email address.  I called and got the General Sales Manager's email for Alberta, as listed above, for Tamara Konrad.  It should be correct now.  Thanks, Anon.)

The Speed of Sound.

Edmonton just lost it's best radio station.  Goddammit.

"It’s called “Lite 95.7″  now. 

Goodbye, cool rock songs. So long, Beck. Hasta la vista, Kings of Leon. Hello, “soft adult contemporary” music – rushing to fill the void left when EZ Rock turned into Virgin. Hello, Michael Buble, Elton John, Madonna, Taylor Swift, Coldplay, Katy Perry, Train and Bon Jovi. 

We know you well! Too well. Don’t 11 other Edmonton radio stations play these overplayed artists already?

Well, it’s a dirty job, but someone’s got to play the soft rock in this town. Right?

The depressing announcement was made today from the corporate overlords: Saskatchewan-based Harvard Broadcasting. This weekend the station formerly known as the Sound will play nothing but Christmas music. No joke. It’s designed to completely blow off the old listeners before the big change Monday morning. New listeners (if any) will be introduced to a brand new morning crew, the husband-and-wife team of Jamie O’Connell and Dan Hunt, last heard on Up! 99.3 before they were “let go.” Previous Sound morning man Ryann Bradley will do the afternoon drives. Many of the old Sound staff will keep their jobs, but sadly, some “don’t fit the new format.”

Only one question here: For the love of God, why?

Station manager Tamara Konrad says, “We did it because nobody else did it first. There’s a hole in this market for the soft AC format. It is a proven format. It’s a top performing radio format in Edmonton and all across Canada.”

Still, ’tis a pity. Those Harvard bozos never even gave it a chance. The Sound was only a few months old. Sure, they languished at the bottom of the ratings heap, yet were ironically the best commercial radio station in Edmonton. Meanwhile, Now! Radio 102.3 is the top-rated station – thanks to massive billboard campaigns – and it’s one of the WORST stations. 

Everything is ass-backwards in the wacky world of Edmonton radio."

My letter to the Broadcasters regarding this termination: 

http://inthewarbetween.blogspot.com/2011/03/my-letter-to-harvard-radio-regarding.html

source: http://www.gigcity.ca/2011/03/25/edmonton-radio-the-little-station-that-couldnt/

A Dent in Peter's Coffin. UPDATES.

http://inthewarbetween.blogspot.com/2011/03/peter-coffin-you-sad-sorry-sonofabitch.html  CONTINUED...


-------------------------------------------------------- comments from alternate post:

Peter returns to taunt me like he taunted Xiaxeu.  Second time's a charm?

----------------------------------------------------------

Does 'I Just DGAF' look familiar?  They should.  They post on this blog:

http://rantsandretardicles.blogspot.com/?zx=80cb0ff8f7b90deb

The one created by someone OTHER than Peter Coffin (because that would CRAZY) to defend him against the haters.  Or something.  Read for yourself.

Even though I repeatedly told him to stop with the new blogs and reddit and Twitter and other futile means to defend his aching position, he insists on taunting me.  Because no one listens to me anyway, right?

Also:

The second rated comment on reddit.

Not to mention being linked by numerous other blogs, articles, thread sites, and Encyclopedia Dramatica.

Now, granted, this means shit in the overall scheme of things, but to insinuate that someone as worthless as myself can't influence anyone by simply posting my observations and "screen shots" (because what proof are pictures, anyway) on a wee blog is a bit naive. Ever heard of 'word of mouth'?  It's not when your imaginary girlfriend puts your cock down her imaginary throat; it actually does something.

Maybe that is what got you into this mess- you don't think anyone else is ever worthy enough to tear down the kingdom of Korean love you have built for yourself.  And yet, here you are... defending yourself on reddit and losing grace and honour with each shallow reply.


Perhaps you'd be better off leaving well enough alone now?

UPDATE:

Peter!  You made it to the big time!! Congratulations.

http://www.metro.us/newyork/life/article/812781--peter-coffin-the-strange-story-of-a-boy-a-model-and-his-girlfriend--page0

He has since deleted all comments impersonating himself as 'I Just DGAF'.  Damn it.  Now the comment threads don't make any sense.  I hate it when that happens.

Funny; Peter Coffin also said of  Xiaxeu "you suck as a person."  I'm sure it's coincidence.

And now Peter's alter-ego I Just DGAF has a Twitter page.  And guess which blogger he's decided to attempt to harass now?  I know. I feel honoured as well.

A Note from Xiaxue's husband:

http://blogs.villagevoice.com/runninscared/2011/03/peter_coffin_fake_girlfriend_xiaxue_asian.php

NEWEST UPDATE:

A reddit member sent me this screen shot of a conversation he had with Peter Coffin.  Peter admitted to meeting this chick in Scotland of all places.  Boom. 

A reddit member privately facebook Peter Coffin requesting information. He MET her in Scotland. So he DID meet her?

If he "met" her then why is he insisting she "doesn't exist"?

 This guy should go into politics.

Continued post: http://inthewarbetween.blogspot.com/2011/03/kimi-kobayashi-banksy-keyser-fucking.html

Make it Stop.

Has anyone else noticed that girls are pronouncing their 'a's as 'e's now?
An example:  douchenugget UCLA girl talks about her American "meeanners".  Kardashians (I don't care, pick one), in their oh-so-sexy baby voices, say things like "eenyway" and "neeame".  Combine this with uptalk and it's like some disgusting vocal virus infecting anyone who regularly watches reality television.




What is this?  Why is this happening?  I can smell the Cover Girl foundation and burnt hair straightening product when I hear them speak this way.  It is weird.

It's like the gay lisp.  Not ALL homosexual men speak like that, but ONLY homosexual men speak like that.

There has to be a reason for this.

Another human being's suffering is never that far from home.

"Heys pretty!

If you get the chance, please do a short tweet/blog post for Zack Finfrock's 24-Hour Draw-A-Thon in aid of Japan. http://www.livestream.com/zackdrawsthings It's totally the sort of thing you should be getting via Facebook, if you were still ON Facebook, but instead, I'm just emailing it to you."

Absolutely. * 

I have done very little for the relief efforts besides donate to the Red Cross and we have two big bags of clothes and blankets etc that we are putting together for them as well.  I shall be taking my own advice, I assure you.  My friend Amber (who happens to have a Twitter page now-YAY-and blog about robots that I will link at the bottom of the page) does a Magic Penny every month and is dedicating this month's to relief efforts in Japan, she just needs some creative ideas.  She was thinking perhaps books, because standing around while your city floods/burns/evacuates and you are left with no drinking water/electricity/food/emergency services/company can get pretty depressing.  A good book can be the escape into another world that may very well be needed.

I mean, for Christ's sake, emergency personnel can not even BEGIN to reach the areas in desperate need.  The damage is too extensive.  I just imagine people who have lost (sometimes literally: check out the video of the woman who had a hold of her daughter until a wave came and the mother watched her child washed downstream) everything they have ever known in  their lives and are now just waiting... waiting for help, waiting for direction, waiting to die?   It breaks my heart.

So, try to do something, Guys.  Twitter and Facebook groups are fine, but maybe if you have things around your house you aren't using... money you were going to use to take a trip that can be put off for a few months... even TIME to help pack up supplies at your local Red Cross depot, please do what you can.  These people have NOTHING LEFT.

All the world peace preaching in the world doesn't do what the support of another during a time of crisis can.

*Amber, if you have any links or any other info in mind, let us all know.  And Christina, I wish your friend luck in his Draw-a-Thon.  He's a good man.

http://scarobotics.blogspot.com/

http://twitter.com/#!/BigMommaScott

Elementary Lessons in Humanity.

Try to wrap yourself around this thought: 

People have a right to basic survival. 

Even if they do nothing. 

Even if they contribute nothing. 

Survival with dignity is one of the basic rights of life. 

The planet has given us enough resources to be able to guarantee that to everyone. 

All we have to do is share.

Oh, America.

Vote With Your Dollar.

People say this and I am a big believer in it.

There is a reason I do not shop at the Walmarts. It is not that they are evil (though some are) or that these places are too pedestrian for someone as sophisticated as I.
It is because the Mom & Pop stores are dying and I adore those places. I miss bodegas and markets and the lovely gems you'd find when going for a stroll. It's hard to miss a Canadian Tire or Sobey's.
Lately, I have seen the numbers and the amount of independently owned businesses are at an all-time low. ("Mommy, what's a record store?") This makes me sad, and the only thing I can really do, besides signing online petitions and joining facebook groups that do a little bit less than nothing, is to ensure my dollar goes to support these stores before they are closed down to become cupcake shops.*

Here's my issue with this concept, though... (you knew it was coming):

The voting is done by those who have been SPENDING the money, not making the money.

This is an important distinction. Like the difference between the consumer vs the customer. This is why most commercials are tailored to the women of the house. They are the customer, but any number of people of the house could be the consumer.
This is the end of that same rope.

The people out there spending the majority of the money being made now are the children, teenagers, and adult children (ages 18-30) of the money makers.

And they are fucking asshats.

They are a marketer's dream because they are still convinced that you are what you can show off and you can be anything with minimal effort or talent.
They will buy the shiniest piece of shit for the most inflated margin and they will treat everything like a temporary fix and be back tomorrow for the newest installation of tout in the social ladder olympics.

And don't get me wrong, I am aware that teenagers have always been ignorant. They SHOULD be. They are still learning what it means to be a douchebag, and there is never a point in telling a teenager anything they must learn for themselves. The problem is that they are constructing a society with this lack of knowledge. They are taking their ignorance and parlaying it into music, media, movies, and morality.

And it is fucking awful.

The parents are making the money, passing it off to the ass hats, and then sitting down on the couch to drink scotch and forget they ever had dreams. The kids then go off to tell the big business machines what the little people are willing to spend their lives on.
And have you SEEN it out there? It is garbage. Almost all of it. And it SHOULD be. As an authentic reflection of the customer base it caters to, it is extremely accurate.

Once the adult children are out of the thick haze of celebrity envy, cock shafts, and Kokanee, they end up having children of their own and I see the cycle starting again. They are letting their children pick the toys, pick the TV shows, pick the clothes they wear, at less than three years old. No guidance... just the path of least resistance.
And it is all enveloped in the ironic guise of self expression.
Except it isn't they who are deciding what they wish to express. They barely even had time to decide who they wanted to be let alone how they wished to express it. They paid the people to tell them how they should be behaving and who they should be emulating. Kim Kardashian made 65 million dollars last year.

People are being touted as movie stars and music icons before they even have their first single out. We don't have to decide who is important enough to worship anymore; it is decided long before we even know who Justin Bieber is. And then people sit on the computer waiting for the next "big" thing.
Not the next great thing. That is no longer important.

And when you are a teenager, being excellent isn't important. Being liked is. Being popular is. Being desired is.

And look around. This is what our society is now trying to sell US on.

Us, the ones who don't give a shit about that anymore.
Us, who do not want to pretend to be lesbians and dance to auto-tune at clubs.
Us, who know what good beer tastes like.
Us, who do not think porn stars are actual "stars".
Us, who know when a label is doing nothing more than using us as a walking billboard.
Us, who can read an article more than 500 characters long.
Us, who think beauty is a little deeper than lip gloss.
Us, who want our news scrupulous, not sensational.
Us, who do not think that showing your tits is empowering to women.
Us, who think our kids should be eating real food, drinking water, listen to artist's music, reading the classics, and playing in the mud.
Us, who are trying to make our voices heard.

Not much is designed for the Gen-X anymore. Ironic that when we would have been the ignorant, shopaholic teenagers I am talking about, we were too busy being broke-ass grunge punks on broken skateboards and listening to skipping CD Walkmans to notice the impact we could have had... if we had the money.


Now I do have money.
But my vote doesn't count anymore.








*What the hell is with the cupcake craze? Is it due to the reality show about Heather and Lori's cupcakes, because they ARE divine and the girls ARE amazing, but honestly, it's nuts. Cupcake boutiques are EVERYWHERE.

"Please deny your children their dreams. "

"Dear Parents,

Please deny your children their dreams.

The child stars you keep complaining about? The ones who go off the rails? That happens because a parent, with stars in their eyes and dreams of fame and living vicariously, decides it’s all right to let the child pursue acting, or dance, or whatnot – and that way madness lies.

I hear you though -- “But she just LOVES to sing and dance! How can I get in her way? How can I prevent her from doing what she LOVES?” I’m not saying you have to lock her in the basement. Let her sing! Let her dance! But why does she have to be an employed professional? Most of the people – good or not – who try out for American Idol are adult, or close to it. Their passions, which I’m sure they had since they were kids, are still alive. Why do you have to drive your kid’s for her?

Let’s say your child wants to be in showbiz and you say yes – what if she doesn’t get hired? What if it’s a long slog of no work and his self esteem gets bruised? Or what if she does get hired, and then all your time and energy goes into taking care of her career? How will your other kids feel? How will you feel, now that you’re just a chauffeur? What if your kid works once, one show or commercial, and then never gets a day of work again? All washed up? That? What if you have to move across the country for him to get work? Is that going to affect your family? How many parents of child stars are divorced? Take a good guess…

Lest you think I’m a hypocrite – yes, I’ve worked with child actors. Key word being actors. They are not stars. Every last one of them would tell you that Canada is different. You can still grow up here and make mistakes and be a normal teenager. There isn’t paparazzi. And none of them have their faces on bedsheets and mugs and toothbrushes.

And no, I’ve never been a parent- but I’ve been a kid. And I had Dreams. And you know what my parents said? ‘Absolutely not. You can try when you’re an adult, if you want to.’ My passion was real. My talent was not. So I never became an actor. Instead I discovered my love of being in charge and bossing people around, which you can do quite well as a writer. Or Producer. Or Director. Or anything where you aren’t Famous. But I know that fame hunger eats away at people…

There comes a level of fame where it’s Just. Too. Much. And it’s a lot closer to the beginning than I think parents think. No wonder the kids can’t handle it. No wonder they’re acting out – in completely normal ways, by the way – and freaking out parents across the nation.

But OK, you say to me – my kid isn’t going to be a ‘child star’, she’s going to be a serious actor. Look at Natalie Portman! She was a child actor, and now she’s an adult actor! Yay!

To which I say: Annette Bening. Julia Roberts. Penelope Cruz. Nicole Kidman. Julianna Marguelies. Alison Janney. Salma Hayek. Tina Fey. The list goes on. You can be successful as an adult even if you haven’t been as a kid. If your kid has a passion for acting at 12? Great. Chances are she’ll still have that passion at 22, and she can pursue it, after you’ve spent her childhood teaching her to be a good, smart, savvy kid who can take care of herself in the professional world. I promise you she will not suffer for not having worked for 10 years already.

And of course there are exceptions to what I’m saying. I know a few of them personally. But so much depends. On who the family is, on when the fame hit, on what’s expected of the child at home. But we’ve seen the ‘child star has too much ‘ story play out waaay too many times for it to be a coincidence. The exceptions, of whom I’m very, very proud of, prove the rule.

So what about hockey moms and dads, Duana? What about them?

Look, I know less about the hockey and other pro-sports worlds. I do know there can be an immense amount of pressure. But the difference is, at the very least, that you can’t go pro until you are (nominally) an adult. Who’s the youngest, most successful hockey star ever? Gretzky? Crosby? They can’t begin to have the same amount of wealth and pressure that Mary Kate and Ashley did. Those two had how many employees by the age of six?

And while I’m at it?

Please, please stop making TV actors your role models for your children. It is bullsh-t. I hear it so much. “I used to think that Hannah was a good role model but now she isn’t!” You’ve forgotten the natural progression of things, i.e. – people grow up. Teenagers do things the world cannot like or understand.

Explain to your children the difference between characters and actors. I know they can figure it out. Explain that entertainers are fun, but they’re not who we look up to and want to be like. That’s saved for (insert role model of your choice, but I highly recommend it’s not someone who’s famous). Explain to your kids that celebrities are Just. Like. Us. So sometimes they make bad choices and do bad things and that’s okay because nobody’s perfect.

Remind your kids that people are on TV because someone liked them, and made the choice that the rest of us would also like them. That it doesn’t mean they’re the best, overall, at everything. It just means they got chosen once, and that could all change. Way too quickly.

Again, I don’t have kids. Maybe I’ll be running out to open calls and talent searches if one day I do. But I would be very very surprised.

And you can yell at me if I do."



source: http://www.laineygossip.com/Child_stars_and_saying_no_to_dreams_Written_by_Duana_.aspx?CatID=0&CelID=0

And the Walls Close In On Christmas...

Always an interesting discussion.  And I usually lose a few people along the way, each and every year.

Ahh, yes... those damn immigrants again.

 

Sometimes it is okay to say that you don't have the answers.  Sometimes, it is the least damaging and most honest answer you can give.

 

It is always a fantastic discussion.  Anyone have anything to add?
I am interested in hearing from all of you on this one.

Oh, yes.  Mike had something to add:

Aaron Sorkin stars in 'In Her Defense, I'm Sure the Moose Had it Coming.'

"Unless you've never worn leather shoes, sat upon a leather chair or eaten meat, save your condemnation."

You're right, Sarah, we'll all just go fuck ourselves now.

The snotty quote was posted by Sarah Palin on (like all the great frontier women who've come before her) her Facebook page to respond to the criticism she knew and hoped would be coming after she hunted, killed and carved up a Caribou during a segment of her truly awful reality show, Sarah Palin's Alaska, broadcast on The-Now-Hilariously-Titled Learning Channel.
I eat meat, chicken and fish, have shoes and furniture made of leather, and PETA is not ever going to put me on the cover of their brochure and for these reasons Palin thinks it's hypocritical of me to find what she did heart-stoppingly disgusting. I don't think it is, and here's why.

Like 95% of the people I know, I don't have a visceral (look it up) problem eating meat or wearing a belt. But like absolutely everybody I know, I don't relish the idea of torturing animals. I don't enjoy the fact that they're dead and I certainly don't want to volunteer to be the one to kill them and if I were picked to be the one to kill them in some kind of Lottery-from-Hell, I wouldn't do a little dance of joy while I was slicing the animal apart.

I'm able to make a distinction between you and me without feeling the least bit hypocritical. I don't watch snuff films and you make them.  
You weren't killing that animal for food or shelter or even fashion, you were killing it for fun. You enjoy killing animals. I can make the distinction between the two of us but I've tried and tried and for the life of me, I can't make a distinction between what you get paid to do and what Michael Vick went to prison for doing.
 I'm able to make the distinction with no pangs of hypocrisy even though I get happy every time one of you faux-macho shitheads accidentally shoots another one of you in the face.

So I don't think I will save my condemnation, you phony pioneer girl. (I'm in film and television, Cruella, and there was an insert close-up of your manicure while you were roughing it in God's country. I know exactly how many feet off camera your hair and make-up trailer was.)

And you didn't just do it for fun and you didn't just do it for money. That was the first moose ever murdered for political gain. You knew there'd be a protest from PETA and you knew that would be an opportunity to hate on some people, you witless bully. What a uniter you'd be — bringing the right together with the far right.

(Let me be the first to say that I abused cocaine and was arrested for it in April 2001. I want to be the first to say it so that when Palin's Army of Arrogant Assholes, bereft of any reasonable rebuttal, write it all over the internet tomorrow they will at best be the second.)  

I eat meat, there are leather chairs in my office, Sarah Palin is deranged and The Learning Channel should be ashamed of itself.

Prolly is Not Probably.

I understand internet slang.  I abhor it, but I get it.
If you are a fifteen year old who texts 1500 times a day, you have to cut shit down a bit.
And yes, it is turning our teen generation into illiterate punks, but that isn't the point of this particular rant.
I just can't stand it when people use, and at some points even SAY, "prolly".

  

"Shannon is prolly just in the shower..."

"You're an idiot."

M.I.A. IS A FAKE: Some Thoughts on Authenticity, Politics, and Truffle Oil.

So, this morning I happened upon the CBC video page to listen to Jian Ghomeshi talk to M.I.A. about her third album that dropped in July.  July.  I totally forgot about it.  But I didn't forget about that one scathing interview that ran in the New York Times in May.

That piece: It got under my skin. It disturbed me, in many visceral and icky ways. 

It seemed, to me, exemplary of the ways and means by which women who use their voices politically are knocked down, knocked over, and fucked up for the public’s entertainment. 

And people liked it. People I like, people I admire, at least one person I’m particularly close to: They responded, joined in the group-kick, were eager to denounce M.I.A. as a liar and a fake and a fraud and a bitch and a bad activist. 

And over what? Over passages like this:

Unity holds no allure for Maya — she thrives on conflict, real or imagined. “I kind of want to be an outsider,” she said, eating a truffle-flavored French fry.

The fact is, valuable things were uncovered in that piece. M.I.A. has been inconsistent, and misleading, about her father’s involvement with the Tamil Tigers. And I appreciated that voices other than M.I.A.’s were given the chance to speak out, in a widely read forum, about Sri Lankan politics and the Tigers; the allegation that she’s being overly and dangerously simplistic, in her unconditional support of the Tigers, is probably true. What I don’t appreciate, however, is the fact that these things were only brought up as a means of destroying M.I.A.’s political credibility — shortly before attacking her credibility on more or less every other front.

M.I.A. is a fake, the article more or less says; no matter what she says or writes or records about global capitalism being a bad thing, no matter how fiercely she would seem to defend marginalized people, she’s just a shallow, narcissistic, bossy, stupid woman who only wants your attention, only wants to be famous, only wants to be a star. 

And did you hear that she was having contractions when she sang “Paper Planes” at the Grammys? Shocking! Provocative! Fame-whorey! Regular-whorey! Unfeminine! Selfish! Bad mother!

Although her publicist had a wheelchair ready and a midwife on call, Maya, who has a deep and instinctive affinity for the provocative, knew that this Grammy moment was not to be missed. It had everything: artistic credibility, high drama, a massive audience. The baby would just have to wait. The combination of being nearly naked, hugely pregnant, singing incendiary lyrics and having the eyes of the world upon her was too much to resist.

Granted, there are a few common-sense things to be pointed out here: That it’s not unusual for women to work throughout their pregnancies, that lots of women go to work on the day that they’re scheduled to go into labor, that labor itself is a long process (the profile even notes that M.I.A.’s son wasn’t born until three days after the performance) and so many women often continue to work throughout the early stages of labor, especially if they’re doing something important or time-sensitive that can’t be re-scheduled — like, say, performing at the Grammys. Or, for that matter, the fact that implying that a woman ought to neglect her job because she’s knocked up is the flip-side of the rationale that says it’s okay to not hire or promote women because they will have to neglect their jobs once they get knocked up. 

But never mind all that: I mean, the wheelchair was right there, but instead M.I.A. was up on stage, almost naked, singing her violent lyrics about murdering people, because she cares more about performing and being famous than she does about her poor little helpless baby boy. What a monster.

In fact, the same common-sense issues keep cropping up, as you read the article. For example: Is it really that surprising that a performer, signed to a major label, wants attention? Is it surprising or exceptional that such a person has money? Is it surprising that a person subjected to constant scrutiny from millions of people has crafted a public face, a version of herself that she puts on when she’s being observed by strangers that is noticeably different and more suited to mass consumption than the one she wears when she’s alone, or with her husband and child, or with her best friends? And: If you were trying to get attention at all costs, if you were coming up with a fake personality that was guaranteed to garner acceptance and approval from the largest possible number of people, would “radical woman of color allied with militant groups” really be the one you’d pick? Because I can think of a ton of more palatable personas. I really can. In fact, it seems to me that M.I.A.’s radicalism — which is pretty much guaranteed to earn her much blowback, from many different people, at many points along the line — might be something that she does because she cares about it. It might just, conceivably, be for real. Because I imagine that it’s a fuck of a lot harder to live with than many of her other options.

But not according to the profile. The profile presents a series of choices, a standard of purity, which almost invariably excludes and diminishes the perspective of the woman it claims to be telling us about. I always read M.I.A.’s Grammy performance as a goddamn beautiful piece of synthesis: half-naked, hardcore, and pregnant, telling the world that she could function as a sexual person, as a political person, as a mother, and as someone who was better at her job than anyone else. She wasn’t giving up anything; she didn’t have to; she could be all of it, at once. But no, she can’t, says the article: She had to make a choice, and she made the wrong one, the bad one, the one that makes her a bad woman. I read M.I.A. as a person in a difficult and contradictory position: Someone who’s come into a huge amount of privilege, after growing up without it, someone who’s benefiting from the very system she condemns, and is attempting to use her position of power to bring attention to the problem. But the article says there is no contradiction: She’s privileged, full stop, and as such is a hypocrite if she even attempts to care or speak about people who are in her former position. 

As the sub-hed apparently runs: “Is the Sri Lankan musician’s political rap more than just radical chic?” You never ask that sort of question if you want your audience to answer “yes.”

If it’s okay to do this to M.I.A., it’s okay to do this to anyone. And the good news is, you basically could do it to anyone. Speaking out about politics is tricky; as anyone with even marginal self-awareness knows, it requires you to be more or less constantly opining on morals and an ideal future world, while also being a person with moral failings (I have them, God knows) who has made plenty of compromises or choices about how to live in the world as it presently exists. Hence, my flip-the-fuck-outery over being interviewed; being regarded as an authority is a little hard to take, given how familiar I am with my own imperfections. But lots of people on this here planet are privileged in one way or another, including people who speak out against privilege. Lots of people are inconsistent, incapable of being hardcore moral vegans at all times; pretty much everyone has unpleasant aspects to her personality. 

If we make personal perfection a prerequisite for speaking out, the result will be silence. It simply will be. There will be one woman, living alone and off-the-grid in a yurt, eating nothing but pickles, interacting with no-one but the squirrels, who walks out to her favorite pooping tree every morning and delivers a brief monologue to it about social justice. She will be the Perfect One, the Chosen One; she will be allowed to speak. And it won’t be a problem. Largely because no-one will actually hear her.

I learned … years ago that women had always been divided against one another, self-destructive and filled with impotent rage. I thought the Movement would change all that. I never dreamed that I would see the day when this rage, masquerading as a pseudo-egalitarian radicalism, would be used within the Movement to strike down sisters singled out… I am referring … to the personal attacks, both overt and insidious, to which women in the Movement who had painfully managed any degree of achievement have been subjected. These attacks take different forms. The most common and pervasive is character assassination: the attempt to undermine and destroy belief in the integrity of the individual under attack… If you are [an achiever] you are immediately labeled a thrill-seeking opportunist, a ruthless mercenary, out to make her fame and fortune.

That’s Anselma Dell’Olio, giving a speech on the state of the women’s movement. In 1970. If things have changed at all, it seems, it’s only insofar as the lingo has penetrated the mainstream. You can’t attack M.I.A. head-on. You can’t say that it’s a problem that she is being heard. But what you can do is attack her reasons for making herself heard; you can take her to task for being selfish, for being ambitious, for not being pure or authentic or poor or unknown or selfless enough: Call her a thrill-seeking opportunist, a ruthless mercenary, out to make her fame and fortune. 

I should be clear: I don’t think that the interviewer was somehow doing this on purpose, trying to silence M.I.A. or shut her down because she consciously perceived her as a political threat. I just think it was inevitable that our cultural discomfort with someone like M.I.A. would eventually surface, in a piece that looked very much like hers. She was the one to write it — and to get her phone number Tweeted, which: BOOOO, bad pool Maya — but it had been a long time coming. It was inevitable. And that’s what makes me sad.

Because no-one, in the wake of this piece, is talking about the Tamils. No-one’s talking about Sri Lanka. No-one’s talking about M.I.A.’s most provocative belief, the one that’s really threatening: The idea that violent oppression can and should be met with violent resistance, which is a complicated and scary proposition, one that people have been evaluating and fighting over for a long-ass time, one that we’re nowhere near figuring out as yet. 

No-one is talking about that; no-one, to be blunt, really cares. 

What we did talk about, instead, was a plate of fucking fries.