June 26, 2012

Note to Self: Letter to Everyone.

If you want to be understood- understand.
If you want to be forgiven- forgive.
If you want to be loved- love.
If you want to be supported- support.
If you want to be energized- be the energy.
If you want support- support each other.
If you want to be heard- listen.
If you want to laugh- be funny.
If you want to be accepted- do not judge.
If you want to feel beautiful- spread beauty.
If you want to be healed- heal your loved ones.
If you want to feel flattered- compliment others.
If you want to be reminded that others really do care about you- love them so much that you feel your heart may rupture.

If you want the love of your life to come back home healthy and happy and full of hope for the future- give others a reason to live life unabashedly and honestly and fully and beautifully.

It does not start and end with us.

Even if some nights if feels that way.

I owe it to Greg to make sure the life he comes back to is more joyous than the one he almost left behind.

June 25, 2012

The Vows Of Those Who Are Not Married. And May Never Be.

"Greg and Sheena have not come together to make a solemn promise or to exchange a sacred vow based upon antiquated tradition."

I have never been a marriage girl, but I have always had the heart of a child, and the devotion of a warrior. I have imagined what Greg and I might say to those who have witnessed our love these past 4 years, and what vows without vows might sound like.
A wedding without a wedding.
A ceremony without tradition.
A declaration from one beautiful wandering mess to another...

Our love for each other: an active noticement to our truth; to declare our choice to live and partner and grow together- out loud and in the presence of friends and family and foe, out of our desire that we will all come to experience a very real and intimate part of our joy, and thus make it even more powerful. Even more joyful. For all of us.

We love in the further hope that our bond will help bring us all closer together. If you are reading this tonight with a spouse or partner, let this be a reminder- a rededication- of your own loving bond. And how you have influenced us to love more, listen harder, forgive easier, and embrace more often.

It is my firm belief that we are not entering into our relationship for reasons of security... that the only real security is not in owning or possessing, nor in being owned or possessed.  Not in demanding or expecting, and not even in hoping, that what we think we need in life will be supplied by the other... but rather, in knowing that everything we need in life- all the love, all the wisdom, all the insight, all the power, all the knowledge, all the understanding, all the nurturing, all the compassion, and all the strength- is present. And already resides here. With us. Whether we remember that or not.
We are not together in the other in hopes of getting these things, but in hopes of giving these things, that the other might have them in even greater abundance. 

It is my firm understanding we have not entered into our relationship as a means of in any way limiting, controlling, hindering, or restricting each other from any true expression and honest celebration of that which is the highest and best from within us, including each others' love of life, love of people, love of creativity, love of work, or any aspect of our being which genuinely represents us, and brings us joy. Including Greg's facial hair and my love of Twitter.

I have said that I do not see marriage as producing obligations but rather as providing opportunities. Opportunities for growth, for full self-expression, for lifting our lives to their highest potential, for healing every false thought or small idea we may have ever had about ourselves & others, and for ultimate reunion with humanity through the communion of our two souls and what that may inspire in others. A journey through life with one you love as an equal partner, sharing equally both the authority and the responsibilities inherent in any partnership, bearing equally what burdens there be, basking equally in the glories.

For love cannot be possessed, nor can it be restricted. And the soul's desire can never be manipulated, can never be entrapped. (Trust me, I have tried.)

So, to be my partner, my lover, my friend, and my confident, I announce and declare my intention to give you, Greg, my deepest friendship and love. Not only when your moments are high, but when they are low. Not only when you remember clearly Who You Really Are, but when you forget. Not only when you are acting with love, but when you are selfish and rude and dismissive and thoughtless, or during whatever moments of darkness that may come. And in light of recent events, we know that they will.

I recognize with full awareness that only a couple can administer the sacrament of dedication to each other, and only a couple can sanctify it. Neither a church, nor any power vested by the government, nor jewelry, nor social pressures, can grant us the authority to declare what only two hearts can declare, and what only two people can make real. WE make our own rules here. And we can break the shit out of those rules whenever we see fit. Even if just because one Saturday night we get drunk and just feel like it.

May those who are nearest to us be constantly enriched by the beauty and the bounty of our love for one another, may our adoration be a source of joy in our life together that serves ourselves, our loved ones, and the world, and may our days together be good and long upon the Earth. 

I love you. I miss you. I am Yours.

~ Sheena

June 21, 2012

June 15, 2012

Suspected University of Alberta HUB Gunman Still on the Loose.


Edmonton Police call Travis Baumgartner "a person of interest" in the early-morning shootings at the University of Alberta.
Police have released a photo of a “person of interest” in an overnight robbery attempt that saw three armoured truck personnel killed and a fourth critically injured at the University of Alberta’s HUB Mall.
Travis Brandon Baumgartner, 21, is believed to be one of several employees of G4S Cash Solutions Canada who was at the HUB Thursday night. He is believed to be in a dark blue Ford F-150 pick-up truck with AB plate ZRE 724.
Two men and a woman died and a fourth victim, a man, is in hospital, city police Staff Sgt. Erik Johnson said early Friday. Police continue to look for a suspect or suspects after receiving reports around midnight of gunshots at HUB, a combined residence and shopping mall that runs the length of several blocks along 112th Street.

It’s arguably the deadliest armoured car incident in Alberta history.

June 4, 2012

Luka Magnotta, National Treasure.

Just got a glimpse of his murder, dismemberment, rape, cannibal video. 1 Lunatic 1 Icepick.
Found another earlier video of him killing 2 kittens by putting them is a plastic bag and sucking the air out with a vacuum hose. 1 Boy 2 Kittens.

Couldn't bring myself to watch either one of them. The videos are extremely hard to find as the RCMP has been diligent in getting them removed. I won't be linking them. No one should have to experience that.

2 videos 1 disenchanted bee.

He kept posting nude "modelling" pictures of himself to sites such as Buzzfeed and Reddit and would then 'like' them. He wanted fame. He found infamy.

What the fuck is wrong with us?